More rage against... you guessed it - The Machine. *Parental Advisory on this one.
A list of ugly, useless places that peddle mind-numbing crap and/or are backed up by shady organisations just waiting to strip away your rights and/or turn Melbourne into dullsville:
Sexyland. Everytime I pass one of these on a highway out in the burbs, I want to smash its stupid displays and fuck its shit up. I don't object on moral grounds - I object because people are boring and tasteless and need plastic toys to express themselves sexually and don't seem to mind the dearth of other sorts of outlets that might cater to their other needs - like bookshops and stuff. I also think they're a monumental waste of flashing lights and PVC.
Gloria Jeans Coffee. Anyone noticed the Mercy Counselling (for young - read 'pregnant' - women in crisis) collection boxes they have the audacity to keep at the counter? It's a thinly kept secret that this company, with its lousy coffee, is bankrolled by some sort of shady anti-gay, anti-choice right-wing Christian organisation. I want to scream this at every sap who approaches their counter to buy something, and to slap the cups of coffee out of the hands of those who just have. The more mess and embarrassment this causes the better.
The BASTARDS who bought the irreplaceable Punters' Club and turned it into a fucking pizza joint; the same bastards who then bought the Duke of Windsor and turned it into... oh yeah, another pizza joint - the same pricks who are now planning to do the same thing to one of the last bastions of sticky carpet in Melbourne - the Tote. Does nobody care? Will nobody say anything until it is no longer possible to see live music in Melbourne but infinitely possible to eat cheap pizza? Who is letting these arseholes do this to our town? Why is there an endless parade of quasi-coolsies and fat pigs who just want to eat pizza and drink disgusting flavoured vodka? It is an established fact that they aim to target every last venue that means something to Melbournians, because they are trying to shore up the loyalty of the punters. People have very, very short memories. It breaks my heart.
Years ago, the local shopkeepers of Lygon Street used their combined weight to shut Macdonalds out of the precinct. Since then, a Starbucks and a Borders have appeared with nary a whisper. What has happened to people? Why isn't there more noise about this???
STOP GOING TO THESE PLACES PEOPLE!!! If you don't, the Northcote Social Club and the Espy will be next. And then, it will be possible to feed your fat, soul-less body full of pizza wherever you are, but there will be no more music - only endless Sexylands littering the highways for all your vacuum-packed requirements.
*Dear regular readership (three at last count) - the raging fury is obviously not directed at you. But if I don't take it out on the keyboard, I'm liable to tip a Gloria Jeans coffee over the head of the next bullfrog in a suit I see popping his spare change in their coffers.
Labels: politics
posted by susanna @ 3:38 pm
10 Comments:
*applause*
Shame there isn't MORE than three people reading this!!
You will be pleased to know Susanna, that I have never been a patron of any of these places... of course I'm in WA... but still.
And good grief, what are these people trying to do!!!? Turn Melbourne into... into... Perth!!!!!?
Dear socialist commie,
Reader number 2 here. It _is_ a sad state of affairs.
But they wouldnt open if they thought there were not going to be many patrons. So in a way, it is an extension of democracy (though in no way related).
As as I've always said, democracy is not the best (optimal/efficient) form of government.
It is sad. Everything will end up bland and blander.
EB - you are in Perth!? You ought to come to Melbourne and visit the Tote sometime soon, before it shuts down. I will meet you there for a beer.
Chai - Argh! It's amazing how what used to be simple common sense is now 'communism'. It shows what a drift to the right can do to people's brains. It's like too much heat.
Though I'll wear the label you've given me anyway, I guess.
NOTE: My fascist workplace has banned access to blogger. I can still read people's blogs, but I cannot see the comments on their sites, and I can't leave comments on mine or anyone else's site. This just means more of my private time spent on blogs - sheesh!
PS Chai - you are right about democracy. It means selfish bogans get to keep voting for tax cuts. I guess we can all live in hope that it won't wash on Saturday 24th November. See you at the polling booth!
Hillsong is the name of that religious group you're after, but you probably already know that.
Interesting that their philosophy is much the same as any classic Christian organisation, although with a significantly ramped worshiping policy of the mighty dollar.
Oh? The bible had been misinterpreted up until now concerning the validity of greed? That's a relief. Allow me to give you a third of my income.
Nice post btw.
hey, hang on a minute. I'm the fourth separate respondent here. Woo hoo - your readership is up 33 per cent!
Also, I hear ya. On all fronts.
fight the power (fight the power)
Thank god for Ti Amo's relentless empire building and Caffe a Taglio....
Also, I refuse to eat anywhere where the kitchen is placed where the toilets used to be.
ESPECIALLY the Punters Club toilets. Surely they have a half-life of about a billion years....
davey - yes, those hillsong idol-voting types sure have interpreted 'love thy neighbour' in an innovative and convenient way, haven't they?
ahahahaha!!!! gigglewick you have just given me a flash of those dingy dunnies, and yes - right near where the kitchen is now (i will admit, i have partaken in their passable pizza). SUCKERS!
My ex - the one I so publically dumped on in my blog - was (probably still is) obsessed with GJ coffee. Do you think we were every allowed to go and buy a latte from a non-generic coffee shop and maybe try the possibility that they actually make nicer coffee in these places? No, we were bloody well not allowed. Hence I read your rant on GJ with a little smirk on my face. One more reason to be well rid of him, I'd say. Kudos for that Susanna :-)
Keep up the rage because while they're is rage there is hope.
oh blakkat, you are well rid of that GJ afficionado!! it's always helpful to have someone in mind when one has a coffee-spilling fantasy. i am happy to have helped with the mental image!
PS - i trust everyone is hungover and happy this morning!
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